Thursday, August 22, 2019

Reinventing Myself

Waiting on my EEG. This is a good day for me, but I would have preferred to do something enjoyable. The technician confirmed I have a brain!

I felt worthless last week, because I couldn’t drive to help out my husband, nor did I feel comfortable being in public by myself. Two drop attacks the past week had unnerved me. I realized the other day I may not be able to work, because of the unpredictability of Ménière’s, but I can write. I can try to reach one person who needs to hear that they are not alone. I can tell them I see them. I can advocate for invisible disabilities and the people who have them.

I have been doing that for awhile. Sometimes I even reach the person who needs to hear my message. I will continue to write about my experiences. Even I needed a reminder that I am not useless. I have a voice that I can use through my blogs and my support group.

A debilitating illness means you must learn who you are with it. You might grieve your past self. You may go through the stages of grief over and over. For me it’s inevitable. Something will throw me into despair, and I will grieve the old me. That is okay. I came through it and realized that my disability may limit what I can do, but it doesn’t define me.

I define myself. I am an adventurer with limitations. I am a voice for the invisible. I am worthy of the life I have been given. It has helped me feel better when I realized what I’ve been doing is try to help others.

In a former life, I worked in Mental Health as a Social Worker. I always wanted to help others and I will continue to do so. I just don’t get paid for it. I AM NOT INVISIBLE! I AM AN INVISIBLE DISABILITY ADVOCATE!

I hope you are spin free!

Love, Peace and Light! Rita

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