Friday, February 16, 2018
As my episodes of dizziness get more frequent, I am trying to decide how to cope. Simple things like walking the dogs can be kind of scary. So far I haven’t fallen, but I have been slammed backwards in this latest round. I have been fortunate that there has always been something behind me, this time my bed. I have a new to me type of vertigo in which things appear to move up and down.
I was diagnosed somewhere between 2000 and 2002, but have been mostly in remission since about 2005. It was quite a shock to have an episode at Disneyland. I suppose it was triggered by being exhausted and not enough sleep. Going on Space Mountain did not help.
I refuse to give in to Ménière’s and as people in my online support group say, “I am going to kick Ménière’s ass.” That being said, I am not going to put myself or others at risk. I will access how dizzy/tipsy I am before venturing out on my own and I will not drive if things appear to start spinning or waving.
How do I know how bad I am if things aren’t spinning or waving? There are some signs... tinnitus gets louder, ear feel clogged, my head feels weird and my eyes move rapidly. If I close my eyes while standing... I will move back and forth or side to side. A little side to side is my norm and I am used to it, but a lot side to side and any back and forth is not. Thus I had better not venture out on my own. That is not to say an episode cannot occur at anytime, but normally there are signs.
There is a fine line between being cautious and being afraid. I am trying hard to not panic or give in to anxiety. The trap there is that anxiety is a trigger for my Ménière’s. I believe that when I went to physical therapy for it, they helped me learn to stop the panic with the various exercises they put me through. And there are tricks I can use like focusing on one point. If I keep that all in mind, I’ll be okay.
I will continue to do the things I enjoy, because to give in means Ménière’s wins. And I refuse to let it win.
Love, Peace and Light!