Unfortunately this means plans have to be canceled. Sometimes even if I have a driver, I cannot go. Like yesterday, my world was a bit topsy turvy, not exactly room spinning vertigo, but the world kept shifting. I didn’t feel safe to be out in public even with my trusty cane. Today is more of the same and though it’s early I had to cancel my plans with a friend. I hate being unreliable, but there is nothing I can do about it.
Today might be a bed day. The bad thing is that I think this is allergy/sinus related. My ear hurts and there is a stabbing pain behind my eye. Unfortunately it is triggering the Ménière’s and I am miserable. On the bright side other than mini spins, I am not having a full blown vertigo attack. Is it weird to say that I almost prefer the old days when I’d have a full blown attack and a couple of bad days, but then I’d be back to normal. Normal except the tinnitus and the occasional off balance moments.
The mini spins are easier to handle on a day to day basis, because they don’t create more of a problem. The full on vertigo I experienced when I was first diagnosed was hard. During one I wish someone would end it for me. Even though I know I am lucky because I only get nausea during these attacks other vomit and worse during them. Still the room spinning for hours is difficult to get through. Then the hangover after is nearly as bad, because every movement feels as if another round of vertigo will strike, not to mention the light and sound sensitivities and constant off balance feeling.
This is my life and I make the best of it, even when it means I sit on the sidelines like I did at Dublin Castle when Ralph and Colleen took a tour. I was having frequent mini spins and just being out was a struggle, but I did it and I survived. I even enjoyed myself a bit.
I hope you are spin free.
Love, Peace and Light! Rita
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